Resources for Coping with Infertility

Going through infertility can be a devastating, confusing, frustrating, and lonely experience. Understanding more about your options can help you feel more in control of a situation out of your control and help prepare you for decisions you may be faced with. You may make choices to build your family in different ways than you ever imagined. This can raise numerous questions about how to make these decisions, what to tell your children and how to cope with infertility.

We’ve compiled a list of books and other resources to provide you with more information and support as you move through the infertility process. For help coping with infertility and loss, contact one of our therapists who can support you through the process.

Recommended Reading List for Coping with Infertility


Not Pregnant

This book is the paperback equivalent of a sensitive, comforting, warm hug: there for you when you’re feeling alone and like nobody else gets it.


The couples guide to fertility: Third edition.

The completely revised and updated edition of the most comprehensive authoritative book on the subject from Drs. Berger and Goldstein, two experts in female and male fertility.


Healing mind, healthy woman: Using the mind-body connection to manage stress and take control of your life.

An esteemed Harvard Medical School doctor who has developed relaxation methods designed to reduce stress and heal the body now applies those techniques to the seven health issues that most commonly affect women.


Conquering infertility: Dr. Alice Domar’s mind/body guide to enhancing fertility and coping with infertility.
In Conquering Infertility, Harvard psychologist Alice Domar—whom Vogue calls the “Fertility Goddess”—provides infertile couples with what they need most: stress relief, support, and hope.


If at First You Don’t Conceive
In this breakthrough book, Dr. Schoolcraft, one of the most renowned fertility specialists, offers hope to prospective parents by explaining what they need to know.



Journey to Same-Sex Parenthood: Firsthand Advice, Tips and Stories from Lesbian and Gay Couples

In this book, Eric Rosswood discusses the hurdles faced by LGBTQ couples during family-building and goes into depth on adoption, foster care, ART, surrogacy, and co-parenting.


Infertility Survival Handbook
Everything you never thought you’d need to know.  After seven years of tests and more tests, treatments, and more treatments, Elizabeth Swire-Falker understands what it means to struggle with infertility.


 A Few Good Eggs

Insight and frank, friendly advice on overcoming infertility — from two women who have lived through it all.



Unsung Lullabies

For people experiencing infertility, wanting a baby is a craving unlike any other. The intensity of their longing is matched only by the complexity of the emotional maze they must navigate.


Overcoming Male Infertility : Understanding Its Causes and TreatmentsIt’s Not the Stork!: A Book About Girls, Boys, Babies, Bodies, Families and Friends (The Family Library)


Using a Donor

Having your baby through egg donation

Having Your Baby Through Egg Donation is a comprehensive guide for those who are thinking of, or pursuing egg donation, as well as for those who are already parents through egg donation.


Mommies, Daddies, Donors, Surrogates. Answering touch questions and building strong families
If you need help having a baby, reproductive technology can supply the answer. But it also raises a host of questions that won’t arise until after the child is born: What will you say to “Where did I come from?” when the answer includes a donor or surrogate?


Assisted Reproduction: The Complete Guide to Having a Baby with the Help of a Third Party

This comprehensive guide takes you through the steps necessary to begin the process, as well as checklists to follow as you make your choices.


Helping the Stork: The Choices and Challenges of Donor Insemination

Helping the Stork The sourcebook for all the information parents-to-be need to know about the choices and challenges of donor insemination Each year donor insemination (DI) offers a pathway to parenthood for the hundreds of thousands who turn to family-building alternatives.



Explaining Third-Party Reproduction to Children:

        Age 0-4 Years


 Hope & Will Have a Baby: The Gift of Egg Donation

This series includes “The Gift of Egg Donation”, “The Gift of Sperm Donation” , “The Gift of Embryo Donation” and “The Gift of Surrogacy”


Why Don’t I Have A Daddy?: A Story of Donor Conception

 (For children of single mothers) By reading this story with a child who was conceived through the help of an anonymous donor, the child will start learning about and understanding his or her family and his or her origins, just as the lion cub does in the story.


 A Tiny Itsy Bitsy Gift of Life, an Egg Donor Story for Boys

This touching story of how a happy couple of rabbits have their own baby by means of egg donation. Using rabbits in this story enables children to easily understand their conception in a simple and loving way.



 One More Giraffe

(Donor Egg only)  Reading this book to your child will help you begin to introduce the key concepts about babies and egg- donation. It is very simple and touches the subject of how some people (in this case giraffes) need help to be able to be a Mommy or a Daddy.


Mommy Was Your Tummy Big?

(Two versions—one for donor egg the other for donor insemination).  The book has been praised by many mental health professionals who work with fertility clinics, and anNYU Child Study Center article offers it as an example of how to tell a young child about his/her donor egg origins.


  It’s Okay To Be Different



 The Family Book

Little Brown Books, for children of donor conception, single parents or gay parents.



The Kangaroo Pouch: A Story About Gestational Surrogacy For Young Children

The Kangaroo Pouch gently guides the reader on the surrogacy journey and answers questions they may have such as, why would someone choose to be a surrogate?



A Part Was Given and an Angel Was Born

By using phrases such as “a part in mommy just didn’t work as it should,” this book removes the “heaviness” from the topic of egg donation and emphasizes the love that surrounds it.



Our Story by Nicola Baxter  Published by Donor Conception Network (DCN) online. 4 versions available.



Ages 7 and Up



Recipes of How Babies are Made

Recipes of How Babies are Made, is a children’s story which explains in a very simple way all the different methods used to conceive children nowadays.



It’s Not the Stork!: A Book About Girls, Boys, Babies, Bodies, Families and Friends (The Family Library)

Young children are curious about almost everything, especially their bodies. And young children are not afraid to ask questions. What makes me a girl? What makes me a boy?


It’s So Amazing!: A Book about Eggs, Sperm, Birth, Babies, and Families (The Family Library)

For middle school aged children, explains reproduction including assisted reproduction.


Let Me Explain: A Story about Donor Insemination

Schnitter, J. T.  (1995).  Let me explain:  A story about donor insemination.  Indianapolis:  Perspectives Press. (for heterosexual couples)



Phoebe’s Family: A Story About Egg Donation

Phoebe’s mom tells her the wonderful and unique story of how she came into being through egg donation.



Where Did I Really Come From?

This book has been written to help parents and teachers answer the age-old question, “Where did I come from?” The answers today are not as straightforward as they used to be.



For All ages

Telling and Talking  Useful series of guides showing families experiences telling their children about donor conception. Available in written form as a  free download at, or order the DVD at  the same website.


Pregnancy Decision Making


Our Heartbreaking Choices: Forty-Six Women Share Their Stories of Interrupting a Much-Wanted Pregnancy

This book is about abortion, but more specifically, about abortions sought due to a poor prenatal diagnosis or due to serious maternal health complications.


A Time to Decide a Time to Heal: For Parents Making Difficult Decisions About Babies They Love




Precious Pregnancies Heavy Hearts: A comprehensive guide for families facing painful choices about their pregnancy and for all who share their painPrecious Pregnancies Heavy Hearts is a comprehensive guide for families faced with complex pregnancy-management issues.

Miscarriage and Loss of Child

Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss

Douglas, Ann & Sussman, John R. (2000) Trying Again: A Guide to Pregnancy after Miscarriage, stillbirth and infant loss.  Dallas, Texas: Taylor Trade Publishing.



 I Never Held You: Miscarriage, Grief, Healing and Recovery

I Never Held You speaks to the heart of women, their families and friends who have either lived through the pain & grief after miscarriage, or who want to better support someone who has.



Parenting After 40

Hot Flashes Warm Bottles : First-Time Mothers Over Forty

 As an older first-time mother of a young daughter, Nancy London combed the bookshelves in search of support and guidance for some of the emotional and physical challenges she faced.


Unspeakable Losses: Healing From Miscarriage, Abortion, And Other Pregnancy Loss

This comforting and healing book is a must–not only for women who have at one time experienced pregnancy loss but also for their parents, sisters, daughters, brothers, and friends.



But I Don’t Feel Too Old to Be a Mommy!: The Complete Sourcebook for Starting (and Re-Starting) Motherhood Beyond 35 and After 40

In this comprehensive work, women who are considering parenting in their 30s, 40s and later-whether for the first time or starting over-will find all the information they need to make informed choices




Egg Donation: (or

Third Party Reproduction: Donor Conception Network

IVF Support:

General Infertility Support:



Health Journeys Guided Meditations Help with Fertility

A double audio set. 4 different guided imagery exercises for the full range of relevant issues, from conception to resolution.


Imagery and Meditations to support a Medicated Fertility (Improve Fertility) Infertility support

Visualizing Pregnancy


Rachel Eddins, M.Ed., LPC-S, CGP on Twitter
Rachel Eddins, M.Ed., LPC-S, CGP
Rachel’s passion is to help people discover their personal gifts and strengths to achieve self-acceptance, create a healthy relationship with food, mind and body, and find meaning and fulfillment in work and life roles. She helps people create nurturance and healing from within to restore balance and enoughness and overcome binge eating, emotional eating, anxiety, depression and lack of career fulfillment.

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