Think Your Spouse is Cheating? 5+ Signs Your Suspicions May be True

No one wants to think about their spouse cheating. Of course, assuming infidelity can do more harm than good. Cheating is one of the biggest trust-breakers in a marriage, and often a reason relationships end. 

But, it’s also not fair to accuse your spouse of cheating when they’re not. Not one of these things means an affair is happening, but a collection usually there are some common signs people tend to show when they’re having an affair. 

Keep in mind that if your spouse is showing some of these signs, it doesn’t automatically mean they’re cheating. But, if you already have suspicions, paying attention to some of these things can help to give you some confirmation before you confront your spouse about it. 

Here are five signs you can look out for to determine if your spouse might be cheating on you. 

1. Your Sex Life Has Changed

Sex is more than just about physical satisfaction when you’re in a committed relationship. It’s also about closeness and intimacy. Noticing changes in your sex life could mean something is going on that you’re unaware of. 

If your sex life is non-existent or you don’t have sex with your spouse nearly as much as you used to, it could be a sign of an affair. If you feel there is also less intimacy between the two of you, that’s also a possible sign. 

2. They’re Changing Their Looks

If your spouse suddenly has shown an interest in improving their appearance, working out, improving their wardrobe, or changing their grooming habits, it could be because they’re trying to look their best for someone else. You might also find that they’re wearing a lot of new clothes, or wearing new cologne/perfume.

They might use gum, and they never did before. Your partner may wear different styles of underwear, and begin using new kinds of soap or shampoo.

People can choose to “take charge” of their lives and better themselves for many reasons. But, if it seems sudden and your spouse hasn’t talked to you about why they’re making these changes, it could be a sign of an affair. 

3. There Is No Communication

Usually, when someone is cheating, the way they communicate with you will change. Some spouses will become overly-attentive to try to overcompensate for what they’re doing. 

Others will seem to “lose interest” in your relationship altogether. They may not tell you they love you anymore. They might not even talk to you, or they’ll stonewall you. Maybe you can’t get them to argue with you anymore.

If things are that extreme, it may be because they’re invested in another relationship. 

4. They Are Indifferent

A sense of indifference in your relationship could be another sign of cheating. Do you feel like your spouse is bored with your marriage, your family, their job, etc.? Do they show indifference when it comes to everything from going out on a date to spending time with family? 

Maybe they’ve even become lazy around the house by not doing their typical chores. It could be because they don’t care anymore, or because they’re dealing with some inner-demons.

Many people who cheat struggle with self-esteem issues, and it can change the way they think and act. 

5. They Are Defensive

Sometimes, the best “sign” that your spouse is cheating is your gut feeling. While you shouldn’t accuse them based on your feelings alone, you can express your concerns. 

If you ever bring up the idea of infidelity to your spouse, how do they respond? Do they get defensive? If you ask for reassurance, are you satisfied with the answer they provide? If not, it could be time to have a more serious talk about the possibility of them cheating. 

6. Habits change

They change the position of the passenger seat. They become harder to reach or stop wearing their wedding ring and give vague answers about where they are going. They may make excuses to go out alone and come home later than expected without calling. They are less interested in family activities and events and go to the gym to work out more. 

7. More and more work events 

More and more business dinners start happening and work events start getting in the way of personal occasions. They might attend more conferences.

Read more: how to recover from an affair. 

Is Your Spouse Cheating? Reach Out to an Experienced Couples Counselor

Ice covered grassIt can be challenging to face relationship issues. Fortunately, guidance is available. Please reach out to us for support. Contact us for a consultation soon. Eddins Counseling Group, in Houston, TX  has many experienced couples counselors that can help you navigate infidelity. Call us at 832-323-1396 or book an appointment online.

 

 

Rachel Eddins, M.Ed., LPC-S, CGP on Twitter
Rachel Eddins, M.Ed., LPC-S, CGP
Rachel’s passion is to help people discover their personal gifts and strengths to achieve self-acceptance, create a healthy relationship with food, mind and body, and find meaning and fulfillment in work and life roles. She helps people create nurturance and healing from within to restore balance and enoughness and overcome binge eating, emotional eating, anxiety, depression and lack of career fulfillment.

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